My mother passed away

 Well, I honestly thought she was tough & mean enough to outlast us all. Unfortunately, her heavy nicotine habit was her undoing. She had not felt right for a while, but refused to go to urgent care or see the Dr. She kept blaming something she ate or the heat. When she finally did get bad enough to call an ambulance, she decided the Dr didn’t know anything when he said it was her gallbladder and left the hospital against medical advice. My being there made that possible. But not before accusing me of talking to the Dr about her living conditions behind her back. (Which I did not do) I was so upset at her leaving the ED that I had my husband take her home. The next day, she once again wanted to to to the ED. I called the ambulance but did not go so she’d have no way to leave AMA. I did keep in close touch with the medical staff & spoke to my mother before her emergency gallbladder surgery. The next day she was up and around, but in a lot of pain. She actually asked me to leave until she felt better. That night the Dr called saying she’d taken a turn for the worst. She had blood clots in her legs that due to her thickened arteries from smoking they had a hard time treating it was preventing blood from reaching her organs. Her kidneys started to fail so the put her on the machine to filter her kidneys. She was already unconscious & on a ventilator. But they had to stop because her blood pressure would plummet. They tried a second time & same thing. She passed away from the clots and lack of blood flow. She was cremated and her ashes spread as she wanted. Now I have 7 cats to rehome and a hoarders house to go through. The sadness comes and goes. It also brings back the pain of everyone else I’ve lost over the last few years. I’m more determined than ever to do the things I want & travel while I still can.